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Thrive! 4 people are doing this
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  • rosewilder
    rosewilder Doing 3 cheers 2017-08-17 15:16:34

    An area of significance to my thriving or lack thereof:
    I had two things happen with my work this past week (with two completely different people) that made me feel very disrespected and highlighted the fact that I am not part of either client's organization, and thus don't feel like I belong anywhere.
    Well, I am not part of either client's organization, but I've been subjecting myself to both of the client's (stupid) rules and disrespect. I don't have the financial wherewithal (or the courage) to stop subjecting myself to their rules- YET- because I need their money. But I don't have to subject myself to their disrespect.
    That is an issue I need to change from within, inoculating myself from caring what either stupid man in power does or thinks, and making as much of my work pleasant and finding value in myself rather than expecting any acknowledgement from them.
    My friend introduced me to the idea of YET. I am not ready to breakout on my own and dump these stupid clients YET- but I will work to get ready to do so in the future. I will spend as much time as I can growing my skills and preparing myself to make it without them whilst subjecting myself to their frustrating rules and rudeness, finding other areas in my career (like speaking at conferences) in which to feel valued and expert.

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  • rosewilder
    rosewilder Doing 3 cheers 2017-08-09 14:40:34

    I am back on track!
    And I am loving it.

    I feel no qualms about my recent big decision. It has increased my health and happiness. I am making better food choices, walking consistently, and I am taking steps to create positive change in my work.

    Big sigh of relief to feel so good again.

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  • rosewilder
    rosewilder Doing 4 cheers 2017-08-07 01:18:44

    Three things to takeaway from the trip:

    1. The power of the trees (forest bathing)

    2. The power of the ocean

    3. Reclaiming my power

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  • rosewilder
    rosewilder Doing 3 cheers 2017-08-01 00:45:57

    Oh, my. Between the change I made that resulted in the uptick of my health and this trip I am taking, I am positively THRIVING.

    I was asked to be on a discussion panel at a conference across the country. I left for it yesterday. Today is rehearsal day for the conference, where we tested our microphones and our spotting for the video cameras (it is being lived streamed on the internet), and the presenters, about 20 of us in all, are having a wonderful time. I feel so energized and powerful with these intelligent, fantastic colleagues. This is the best I've felt about my work in some time!

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  • rosewilder
    rosewilder Doing 5 cheers 2017-07-11 13:15:18

    So, the jogging has not worked out- my fledgling efforts injured my knee, and I was told by various folk that people with knees such as myself should stick to walking.

    Fortunately, I've been walking on a consistent basis these past 10 days, (despite the knee pain- it's manageable even when walking 2.75 miles per day) and that should take care of the exercise component necessary for my thriving.

    Now, as for the other aspects of Rose Wilder thriving:
    I have 48 hours of leisure in front of me. I just finished 3 major projects at work (it's been grueling!) and I'm taking today and tomorrow completely off. Tomorrow I am taking Frog and the girls to the next state over for a family party, but today... what shall I do with today?

    I've noticed lately a lack of clarity about how I want to spend my non-work, non-parenting hours. Nothing is calling me. What do I want to do? I'm not sure.

    One thing I know I will do today: I will do my usual 2.75 miles on the shore of the ocean. That should be pleasant. Beach, here I come!

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  • rosewilder
    rosewilder Doing 4 cheers 2017-08-17 15:00:08

    August 14-16, 2017
    I'm down 5 pounds, which is a very nice motivator/reward for this goal.

    However, I must remember that it's a change in my approach to food that I want, not a decrease on the scale that will be temporary if I don't carefully, permanently change my eating habits.

    Since it took me 47 years to solidify these eating habits, I can't expect to improve them quickly.
    One day at a time.
    (One hour at a time?)

    Go slowly, and make deliberate choices, not reactions.

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  • rosewilder
    rosewilder Doing 3 cheers 2017-08-14 17:45:38

    August 12-13th
    Still doing well on portion control, with the exception of Sun night when my sister's family brought over a pizza. I ended up having 2 large slices- I should have limited it to one.
    Still, I'm eating much less then I was, in general. I guess things like pizza, especially when I'm limiting myself so much generally, are going to trip me up from time to time, no matter how hard I try. I guess as long as I make sure it's only once in a while, I can incorporate it into a more healthy lifestyle.
    Reminder: If I'm walking 4 miles in a day now, I need to up my water intake!

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  • rosewilder
    rosewilder Doing 1 cheers 2017-08-12 15:42:28

    August 9th- 11th
    Hm. Portion size still relatively down. Trying to incorporate more protein.
    I did have ice cream when we were out. I made sure to have a small only, but even a small comes in at 500 calories, which I know pushes me over the edge of my limit, even though I'm not actually keeping a calorie limit right now.
    Last night for dinner, (not a family dinner) I didn't have a lot of time, and thought I was going to have to go to a quicker and not as healthy solution, but I saw we still had some salmon burgers in the freezer. I microwaved them, which certainly didn't taste as good as it would have if I had had the time to grill or bake them in the oven, but was good enough, and definitely the knowledge that I was fueling my body with protein and healthy fats rather than processed foods made it very worthwhile.
    I am not wanting breakfast right away in the mornings these last few weeks that I'm not going into the office. Actually, I suspect I didn't ever really want breakfast right away- I just felt I had to eat before I went to work or I'd be too hungry later. I guess the answer for when I start going back to the office on an almost daily basis is to make some healthy portable breakfasts that I can have at about 10am when I get hungry there.

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  • rosewilder
    rosewilder Doing 1 cheers 2017-08-09 14:54:55

    August 7th
    I am not very hungry in the morning, I noticed. I walked a bit in the morning and had a late breakfast, and it was fine.
    I added sugar to my steel cut oats, knowing it wasn't such a great idea, but if I'm eating smaller portions of steel cut oats instead of emptier carbohydrates, maybe it's worth the small extra sugar intake. For now. I hope to retrain my palate soon. (Right now, I won't go for honey or other substitutes that people have recommended: I want the real sugar in those oats. But this is a work in progress, and I'm doing great so far.)
    In the evening, Frog made hamburgers, and I ate as many delicious fresh peas as I could and had the hamburger without the bun.
    I still probably need to up my protein.

    August 8th
    I didn't do as well today as yesterday. I fell victim to pasta. LOL. However, I was more careful about the portion size than I've been in the past, so that's something. (It's not like it's realistic to say I'll never eat pasta again- it's my favorite food. I'll probably eat more of it than the average person, but I'll work on decreasing the frequency and the portion sizes.)
    I made pizza bagels for the family for dinner, and I had one, which wasn't the greatest idea since I had the pasta earlier. That was not a good choice.
    Overall, I did control portion sizes all day, which is good, but I don't think I ate enough vegetables and fruits. Or protein, still. I'm glad about the work I've done on being cognizant of portion sizes, though.

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  • rosewilder
    rosewilder Doing 1 cheers 2017-08-07 15:06:51

    I am going to do some observation of this messy relationship I have with food. Ideally, I won't judge harshly, just observe patterns.

    August 5th: After overeating and eating much junk on the trip, I found myself in a situation unable to grab anything to eat before getting on the plane. Of course, domestic airlines don't serve food any more, so I had to do without except for water and the small bag of snack pretzels.

    It made me think about hunger. Hunger, in small, infrequent doses, is not a terrible thing. It seems sometimes that I eat because it's time to eat, not because I'm really hungry. (I also eat because I'm bored, or for pleasure, but that's a whole other entry.)

    Knowing that hunger isn't so awful will help me stop eating just because it's time to eat, and/or I may not be able to eat later, so I don't want to be hungry.

    August 6th: Today, I was so tired after the red eye flight that I didn't bother to make myself breakfast before I went to sleep. I slept in for some time, and when I woke up, I concentrated on keeping my portions small and my choices healthy. I'd like to reset my stomach, if you will, to become accustomed to smaller portions, as well as more consistently choose healthier foods. (i.e. less sugar, fewer carbohydrates, more protein).

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Declutter 115 people are doing this
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  • rosewilder
    rosewilder Doing 7 cheers 2017-03-23 12:35:49

    Today is a great day for spring cleaning! I will put an hour into finding the things I don't need and assigning them a new home.

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  • rosewilder
    rosewilder Doing 12 cheers 2017-02-20 15:59:55

    That might have been the hardest hour of my day! There is so much emotional baggage that goes along with the physical clutter: an important thing to recognize and accept.
    I started with the easiest area in the house: the bathroom. There were quite a few expired toiletries to throw out. A few things I bought and never used. I think the reason I haven't gotten rid of them previously was because I wanted to be the kind of person that _____. (Polished my nails, etc.) But I'm not that person, and that's okay.
    Then on to the bedroom: much harder. Two areas that I didn't have success with: gifts that I don't want but can't seem to get rid of (some of these have been hanging around for years) and my deceased great aunt's jewelry and personal effects. I don't use them, but I can't seem to donate them either.
    Easier (but not easy) to donate or discard was extra buttons I've been saving in case I lose a button, a pair of unattractive earrings (I haven't worn earrings in 5 years, been saving them in case my daughters want them some day, but I can give them the attractive pairs I saved for them!), a coin purse (I have another better one if I actually ever use a coin purse), a glasses case I hadn't used in over 5 years because I got a better one, a pair of old glasses that are no longer my prescription and quite frankly, not too flattering, and an old journal. (It still had pages left in it, but I am not living in some sort of journal shortage!)
    It's really embarrassing to see how "just in case" and miserly I am. You would think I grew up in the Depression, for goodness sakes. I clearly have to spend more time with this meditation affirmation: I live in material, and non-material abundance.

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    • rosewilder
      rosewilder Doing 2 cheers 2017-02-22 13:31:56

      @meditation7 Thank you so much for the good energy sent my way, the support, and the inspiration! I really appreciate it.

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    • wyverndust
      wyverndust 2 cheers 2017-03-01 23:59:42

      @rosewilder this is kind of crazy but I have a whole drawer full of wayward buttons and another drawer full of old costume jewelry from a great aunt! When I was a teenager I wore the jewelry but not any more. I may need to look at some decluttering soon, too

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    • ahorrasi
      ahorrasi 2 cheers 2017-03-02 01:09:05

      @rosewilder good to see you on here! Havent' in the other place in a while. I collect all the weird craftsy paraphernalia and sicne I still technically craft, i will hold onto that stuff until/unless i have to relocate to another planet.

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    • rosewilder
      rosewilder Doing 3 cheers 2017-03-02 02:37:15

      @wyverndust That is such an amazing coincidence! It must be something about being a great aunt. ; )

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    • rosewilder
      rosewilder Doing 1 cheers 2017-03-02 02:40:52

      @ahorrasi , It's so good to see you, too!

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  • rosewilder
    rosewilder Doing 6 cheers 2017-02-19 16:26:24

    I am going to dedicate an hour to this today. As I harbor a touch of hoarder in me, I am going to make a game of it: how many items can I discard or donate in an hour of organization?
    Let the declutter games begin! May the odds be ever in my favor.Β 

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  • rosewilder
    rosewilder Doing 5 cheers 2017-08-12 15:55:54

    Today, I am so grateful for:

    1. The last hurrah with the fireflies on Thursday night before they leave for the season. Goodbye, beautiful fireflies. I am so grateful for you and for the gorgeous summer nights you inhabit.

    2. We adopted a dog (I gave in to my two children and my child- husband.) The dog is sweet, and reasonably well-behaved so far, especially for a frisky year old dog.

    3. Said dog has even further motivated my exercise progress. I've taken him on multiple walks every day since we've gotten him, and my mileage is going up, up, up!

    4. While I was away on business, Frog was an adult-husband and not only held down the fort and kept the kids alive but took on on a kitchen counter/backsplash redo that required a lot of work and will make the kitchen look so much nicer when he finishes it, maybe in the 22nd century. (I kid, I kid. but only partially.)

    5. Fresh English peas! Yummy, snacky, and incredibly healthy.

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  • rosewilder
    rosewilder Doing 3 cheers 2017-07-11 13:20:17

    How on earth have 10 days passed since I last did this?
    (and why, despite the most predictable phenomenon in the world, the passage of time, am I always surprised by it's speedy passing?)

    Today, I am grateful for:

    1. The onset of my cycle and the end of miserable PMS.

    2. Getting lots of exercise.

    3. Time off work.

    4. Having just enough in the bank account to pay the big bill. (just enough is plenty- remember that.)

    5. The ease of email.

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  • rosewilder
    rosewilder Doing 3 cheers 2017-07-04 01:25:09

    When in doubt, practice gratitude:

    1. The invigorating ocean!

    2. Good sunscreen

    3. and remembering to reapply.

    4. Singing

    5. Making peace.

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  • rosewilder
    rosewilder Doing 3 cheers 2017-06-25 17:10:20

    Today, I am so grateful for:

    1. Breeze.

    2. Ocean.

    3. Friends.

    4. Help.

    5. Intimacy.

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  • rosewilder
    rosewilder Doing 4 cheers 2017-06-20 14:29:44

    Gratitude despite struggling:

    1. Dopey cat affection in the middle of the night.

    2. Caffeine this morning to counter the dopey cat affection in the middle of the night.

    3. The torrential rains let up JUST when I needed.

    4. Voice to text capabilities.

    5. Hope.

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  • rosewilder
    rosewilder Doing 1 cheers 2017-07-11 13:26:27

    For a little extra incentive to get more goal-focused by posting here more:
    I'm going to start keeping a record of my miles again. It's more fun to rack up bigger numbers, so I'm going back to the cumulative format.
    From July 1- December 31, 2017, I will walk:
    (does calculations in head. half of 52 is 26, 26x16 is 416, giving myself a bit of leeway in the colder, icier months....)
    400 miles!
    New goal coming.

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  • rosewilder
    rosewilder Doing 3 cheers 2017-02-18 14:52:27

    Today's task to honor myself: check workshop dates and price; email and ask if it's okay that it's a work in progress.Β 
    (This seems minor, but it takes courage.)

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  • rosewilder
    rosewilder Doing 5 cheers 2017-02-17 13:29:03

    Hoo boy. Apparently I have fear of rejection issues.
    Last night, I dreamt the editor of my favorite literary magazine (who is really a man but was a woman in the dream) and her assistant, who for no explicable reason was Melissa McCarthy) were critiquing my manuscript. Editor was crossing out large sections of text, really pressing down hard on the pen and scribbling so you couldn't see the words anymore. I asked her to just circle the sections she thought I needed to change- it hurt my feelings that the words were figuratively and literally being obliterated- and she went to the title page and circled the whole thing, stating that it was all awful. Then, Melissa McCarthy said , "Remember when I said you should focus on poetry? That was just so you would write less words. The less words you write, the better. "
    I woke up with my heart pounding in fear. I was so angry and scared, and then I realized- oh, that's why I avoid writing. Fear of rejection. Fear of not really having any talent.

    I will not let that cruelty, that horrible fear win.

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  • rosewilder
    rosewilder Doing 5 cheers 2017-04-29 15:27:58

    A-hem. Ms. Wilder, it's been 10 days since you last celebrated your minor accomplishments. Kindly proceed:

    1. I sent the reimbursement application for my business travel (better late than never).

    2. Walking, walking, and more walking! I've now been ramping up my exercise for almost a full month.

    3. I made a conference with Tadpole's teacher to discuss some issues upon which I want to get a better handle.

    4. I conducted a really great webinar on Monday. It was one of those moments of "flow", and the part of my work that I truly enjoy.

    5. I boxed up all the fall/winter clothes.

    6. I was supportive of my spouse despite my doubts.

    7. I invited everyone to Mother's Day.

    8. I was firm but loving with my daughter.

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  • rosewilder
    rosewilder Doing 5 cheers 2017-04-19 12:27:38

    I had a conversation with an acquaintance- one that I hardly know- that yielded an excellent reminder to focus on the good. She suggested that I keep a list of accomplishments as well as the overwhelming to-do list I keep. So I'm going to do that here. It's a bit like my gratitude list, but it's focused on what I've done right or even just done. It's a great way to counter the constant feeling of "I have too much to do, I never get it done," which is an anxiety and non-honoring thought to allow to take precedence in my mind.

    So, some things I did right or got done recently:

    1. I completed and mailed the child care application.

    2. I have walked the last 8 days in a row without missing a day.

    3. I helped Frogette with her summer paperwork.

    4. i made family dinner last night.

    5. I completed the flyer.

    6. I pitched a gig (a non- big boss gig! yay!) that was accepted. A little more moolah for me!

    7. I washed the dishes.

    Thoughts: it was very hard to not counter these in my mind. (i.e. "Well, maybe I did the dishes, but the kitchen floor is filthy!" or "Ooh, big deal. You made one family dinner. What about all those other times you slacked and didn't do it.")
    NOPE! Please stop that, Rose Wilder. It's unnecessary and unkind. I wouldn't say those things to a friend, would I? I should treat myself as well as I treat a friend.
    I am going to keep on adding to this list, a little at a time, and try to celebrate everything I put on it.

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  • rosewilder
    rosewilder Doing 4 cheers 2017-02-24 16:05:49

    Two nightmares about my in-laws recently. A good reminder to try to honor and nurture myself when it comes to them.

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  • rosewilder
    rosewilder Doing 5 cheers 2017-02-18 14:52:52

    Today's task to honor myself: check workshop dates and price; email and ask if it's okay that it's a work in progress.Β (This seems minor, but it takes courage.)

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