Kalocia

Ok, I’ve found my condo and with a really good deal, I’m in the middle of escrow right now… AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!! Yeah, I got realllly tired of renting too, and it was a fluke that I found the place I’m going to be at by the end of the month.
Its driving me nuts,though, not knowing exactly when I’m going to be able to close escrow and get the keys. I’m breaking my lease on my apartment (the same apartment I have right now, at $1335/month (yeah, I know its a lot but its GORGEOUS and HUGE!!!), is being rented at $1475/month. I figured that within the next five months, it will go up to at least that…my mortgage is going to be $1580/month tentatively) and am in the middle of starting to sort and pack all the stuff I’ve been storing. PLUS, since I’m breaking the lease, I’m still responsible for the rent until they can rent it to the next person (although, the places seem to be going pretty quick lately, so I’m hoping it goes quickly too…)
I kind of don’t want to pack the big stuff, just in case (fingers crossed!) it falls through. I really doubt it will, but I’m totally paranoid right now that something’s going to go wrong. A friend told me, ‘you’ve signed the contract and given them your deposit – you’ve BOUGHT the place’ but I still worry. This is my first house/condo and its such a big deal! EEEEEE!!! :D

Now that I have realized what I’m doing to myself, its been a lot easier than I thought to really think about what I’m eating and why. For the past few days, every time I get a craving for something or have an urge to eat everything in sight and go back for more, I try to consciously think, “What good is this going to do for my body?” I heard an expression, “Eat to live, don’t live to eat.” Yeah, it sounds trite, but if you think about it, its pretty true…Its just how you choose to apply it that matters. I mean, the box of donuts really isn’t going to do much for me except make me feel like crap afterwards and gain weight, so if I want something sweet, I’m gonna get a little bit of the reeaaaallly good stuff and enjoy the heck out of it! I think having and keeping a new perspective may be the way out of this for me… lets hope. :)

I started taking lessons about a month and a half ago, and am loving it! Every once in a while it scares me, like when the horse freaks out because another one is behind it and starts to kick or buck… its at that moment I realize just how high I am up on the horse’s back, and how hard I might hit the ground… yeesh, but I keep going back! Someday I’m going to be very confident and able to actually control the horse while trotting :)