Step out of my comfort zone

It’s been 7 full days now and each day I did something out of my comfort zone each day. I realised that there really was “nothing to fear but fear itself”. It’s all about stretching myself and what I think I am capable of doing/thinking/saying/being. I am going to mark this goal as done for the time being. It’s no longer the case of doing something each day just to fill the 2 things quota. It’s more about doing something that is out of my comfort zone whenever the need or opportunity arises.

It’s worth doing because it helped me understand that a lot of the time, it’s only fear that was holding me back, the fear of embarrassment, fear of failure, fear of rejection etc. And most of the time, the fear is not “real”. It’s your perception that is “real”. If you preceive people will think you are being silly or whatever, you will FIND evident to support that. If you preceive that people will be supportive, all of a sudden the world seemed a more friendly place.

• Asked for a “loyal customers’ discount” and got it. :D :D

• Stayed home instead of going to a luncheon where I would’ve run into the guy I am trying to forget. I really wanted to see him, but I know if I did see him, I may risk relapsing. I fought hard to resist the temptation of actually attending the luncheon…

• Went to a suburb where I had never been to before. I got lost since I can’t read maps very well…

• Attended a support group (details please see finding a support group goal). It was way out of my comfort zone… walking into that door felt like a huge task… I was very late as well, and I normally do not turn up if I was late, like when I was in uni, if I was late for a lecture, I went to the library instead… But I made myself still turn up dispite of being late (was lost, see previous point).

• Watched a movie by myself… Hey it’s actually easier to find good seats watching a movie by myself LOL

• Attended a party of a friend and met about 40 new people. I made a conscious effort to get to knew a few of them. I am not exactly comfortable with crowds, especially crows of people whom are not exactly strangers yet not exactly friends. With a crowd of total strangers I felt more at ease as I most likely will never see them again. But with a crowd of somewhat in betweens… It was more difficult to know where to start, what to talk about and where the boundries are.

• Tried a new food item. It’s a pink sticky rice… or was it purple…It was hmm… interesting…

• Watched 2 french films for the french film festival, neither were what I would normally watch in the cinemas. I usually go for movies which I could leave my brain at the door (i.e. require very little thinking) as I generally treat mainstream movies as popcorns. The first movie was a total action flick but I surprising enjoyed it immensely. The second was very disturbing as it felt very close to home. I was feeling very uncomfortable as I watched the characters struggle, love, and lay their lives to bare. I was close to walking out but I stayed. (full reviews please see my Learn French Goal)

• Gone shopping with a friend in some exclusive boutiques while not “dressed the part”.

• Resist the temptation to apologise for things that I am not responsible for, for example, someone in the family left the bus pass at home, normally I would’ve jumped right in and said, “I am sorry, I should’ve reminded you.” But I didn’t apologise today because he’s old enough to take care of himself, and it is not really my fault that he didn’t allow enough time to get ready in the morning therefore forgetting the bus pass. Besides I wasn’t even there to remind him when he was leaving the house! Now thinking about it… My tendancy to apologise for things like this…is rather silly. :D

• Tried on some clothes that I won’t normally wear and found SOME three quarter pants do look quite nice on me…

• Had a discussion about the efficient way of knitting with a nice little old lady on the train

• Did not ask anyone to do anything for me that I can do myself. (This may sound weird, but I am quite spoilt by the people around me…)

1. Told my boss no on a task that I am not comfortable of rushing just to get done.

2. Spoke to a stranger on the bus

I am going to try to do 2 things each day that are outside of my comfort zone, no matter no small they may be.

“To begin with, do two things each day that you don’t want to do, in order to stretch yourself and expand your idea of who you are and what youa re capable of doing. Stand up for yourself when you’d rather it doesn’t matter, or return an item that is unsatisfactory even if you’d rather just throw it away. Make that phone call you’d like to avoid. Learn how to take better care of yourself and less care of everyone else in your interactions. Say no to please yourself, rather than yes to please someone else. Ask clearly for something you want, and risk being refused.”
—Robin Norwood, “Women who love too much”