live passionately

I felt so passionate this summer and then fall came and my passion fell. Now it’s snow outside and I’ve been living in a sort of coma for months. It could be the fact that it’s getting darker and darker outside, have heard about seasonal depression, BUT I plan to end this negative trend NOW.

Instead of asking the question what I should do today, I should as the question what I would like to do today. Then do it.

- Catch up with my friends, always a pleasure!
- Do absolutely nothing all day, no problem!
- Play the piano and singing falsely, what’s stopping me?
- Ride my bike to the middle of nowhere with my sketch book and draw everything in my that’s on my mind, I’m already on my way!
- Find a recipe, go to the store and then surprise my family with dinner, sounds like a challenge I’m up for!

This will be my new philosophy, hopefully it will work out well :)

Today I’m doing absolutely nothing! I’ve been so busy for two weeks now that I consider this to be a quite passionate day, just taking some time to reflect and catch up with my self, reload.

I haven’t done this lately. I’ve just been working over and over, soon 2 weeks straight. Unlike school my head is clear but my body is exhausted. I can’t and won’t continue like this. However this is my last weekend at work, then I’m unemployed again.

I need to escape from reality for a while.

There is an old lady at the elderly centre who has lived the most extraordinary life. Since I have “professional secrecy” I can’t tell how, but the happenings in her life truly inspires me to live passionately. When I grow old I also want to have amazing stories to tell about places I’ve been and risks I’ve taken. I don’t want to waste a single day feeling like I’ve accomplished anything.

I had an hour lunch from work. I took my bike, bought a sandwich and a newspaper and placed myself on a bench in the park. I was sitting right beside the pond, where ducks where swimming and quacking. It was peaceful and I felt like timed stopped and I was just living in the moment (something I seldom feel myself doing).

This is a way of living passionately for me. Take opportunities to relax and be aware of what’s around you. I believe they call it “Mindfulness”.

I sat by a lonely red barn out on a field today, in the sun, with my guitar and sketchbook. It was beautiful. I played some songs and as I was about to draw the grand clouds raining in the distance a friend called me behind my back. It was the neighbour’s cat. Great! A model! Tried my best to capture its movements on paper. It was a challenge, but quite fun watching it playing in the grass.

Can life be simpler than this?

I’m going with my family to my grandparents’ house at the countryside. It will be a great opportunity to run down the fields, pick flowers, take the rowboat out on the lake and read a great book up in the attic at night. It will also be a great time for reflecting about my life and letting go of al my problems for a minute.

This weekend I’ll just live passionately and enjoy life! :)

9.15 pm, I am about to go home, by bike, 5 km, uphill, and what happens? It is raining. I had no jacket, just a t-shirt.

Strangely I find myself laughing half the way home. I guess I was glad that my trip home became a little adventure, something out of the common day to day life. I also thought about the good jokes I could make walking through the front door at home. Does anyone want a hug?

I guess this has to do with living passionately, finding excitement in small things. The trip was definitely more fun than my usual. I got home faster too! And I guess my clothes needed washing anyway ;)